A negative habit is often identified by its overt and seemingly dysfunctional nature. And beyond those obvious negative habits such as watching too much television, overeating or leaving the toilet seat up (not me, those other guys), we also have many habitual behaviors that have been there with us for quite some time. Ways of behaving that while clearly not dysfunctional may still be reflections of opportunities for growth and expansion. In reality these are all just strategies for meeting a need (except the toilet thing, that's just inconsiderate). Of course, if your strategy is working for you and not hurting you or anyone else then that's great. However if your habit is something that you feel is working against what you really want then there is an effective path to changing that habit or behavior and feeling more aligned within yourself.
"All healing is essentially the release from fear."
When we experience anger it is because we have reached a degree of perceived separation that is so 'real' that we feel utterly alone. In that state of apparent aloneness we are left with what seems to be no choice but to lash out, blame others and defend our existence.
But you are never alone and you are never separate and the path to deep peace is easily within reach if you allow it.
The implication of this quote above from the great Roman stoic and Emperor Marcus Aurelius is that we look outside of ourselves to know ourselves. It is my opinion then that in doing so we diminish ourselves and in fact contrary to the former part of the quote, we love ourselves less. Not less than we love others but less than the complete state of love that we should have for ourselves. It is this lack of self love that stifles our confidence and puts us on unstable ground in whatever we may endeavor.
When you can step into self-forgiveness and self-compassion you can experience self-love. And from that self love you can do, be and have anything you want. That is true self-confidence.
Self sabotage is a term that is regularly used in the self-help and psychology fields that refers to a person creating problems in their daily life which interferes with their long-term goals and well-being. It is really an entire niche within these fields that has spawned numerous programs designed to help people overcome self sabotage. And undoubtedly these programs may be effective to varying degrees. In fact I am not writing this to impugn those people or their programs.
The reason that I believe that it is a myth is because it is a conflation of terms and an overgeneralization of the word self. The dictionary definition of the word self is a person's essential being that distinguishes them from others. Notice the words, essential being. I believe that when we use the word self it should hold power and that it should imply our innate wholeness. Your true Self is whole and complete and nothing can change that.
"I should definitely tell my husband how I feel..."
"But really, it's my own fault for being this way..."
"Except, he just doesn't seem to understand what I need..."
"Maybe if I tried harder it would change things..."
"Honestly things will probably never change, besides think of how difficult this change will be..."
Write something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview.
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Disclaimer: Hypnosis is a partnership between the client and the facilitator to create change in both the conscious and subconscious mind. I am a certified Clinical Hypnotherapist, not a Licensed Medical Doctor or Mental Health Professional. As such, hypnotherapy services performed are non-therapeutic and not intended to take the place of professional counseling, medical, or psychological care and should not be used as a substitute for diagnosis or treatment of any condition. I do not work on pain or diagnosed mental or physical conditions without the referral from a licensed practitioner of the healing arts per North Carolina State Statutes. If you are under the care of a medical professional for any condition for which you are seeking hypnosis support, please obtain a signed, written referral from your provider prior to engaging me and moving forward with related sessions.
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